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I’m awake at 4:00 AM for the same reason as everyone else: to make sure the backyard is devoid of cats, possums, skunks, and raccoons before I let my horrible chihuahua/spaniel/poodle mix out to take a pre-breakfast shit

A reminder that the Temecularantula, a cryptid I made up, not only exists but terrorizes the vineyards of Temecula, California, on a nightly basis

A fried chicken fast food place is opening 2 doors down from my apartment complex so I'm probably going to die this year

Touchin' butts, eatin' nuts, bustin' guts, Jabba-in' hutts

We’ve been going through the Ghibli catalog on HBO and thus far Ponyo has been the far and away favorite

We went from Morning Musume to BlackPink and nobody is acknowledging it

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I mean the largest cultural shift we aren’t talking about from Millennials to Gen Z is from JPop to KPop and we need thinkpieces on this

Look, if you don’t want to see me in my boxer briefs singing early 2000s J-Pop to myself then don’t be awake at 3 AM watching me water my blackberry bush.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you my greatest invention yet: the PUZZLE TOILET

I just want to see shitposts. I need a reprise from the awful going on out there.

So glad the city I consider my "home" (Redlands) is currently in the news because of some sort of arson?

Everyone always asks for the lyrics to Mambo Number 5 but never Dadbo Number 5

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Toot! A Jason Scheirer Instance

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