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I ate too many spicy tater tots last night and now I have spicy diarrhea. Pray for Mojo.

On the one hand, I married a normal person.

On the other hand, I TOLD YOU ABOUT STAIRS isn’t funny to her.

Slowly trudging into the ocean. As the water gets up to my neck and the waves begin to overtake my face you hear my final words: “it’s cold in here”.

My Mastodon instance continues to deteriorate as I have disabled the streaming service after building a new Redis from source on Squeeze and having it not work

Does May the 4th ever happen on a 4/20? That would be so epic.

I’m sorry this is about Linux 

I appreciate how restaurants are advertising huge amounts of food for delivery as ‘family’ meals and not ‘we know you’re gonna it eat all by yourself in 2 days, you’re too lazy to order food every day so here’s a bucket of slop for you to graze on you pig, you piggy pig’ meals.

Hi, my name is Dick Tractor and I’m here to fix your door jamb. Your landlord called me for you.

I imagine that at every sandwich shop that every time the phone rings a person picks up half a dozen sandwiches and says "hello?" before finally picking up the phone.

How many is enough?

Bumper sticker

Keep honking
My ass is throbbing with parasites

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Toot! A Jason Scheirer Instance

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