Show more

if i were me i would simply be able to keep a schedule instead of being a disaster

As a boring-ass person the most interesting thing I’ve learned in the past year is a ^ over a vowel in French means “there used to be an ‘s’ after this”

The IWW (Industrial Workers of the World) have an important message for you at work this Monday:


Respect yourselves, protect yourselves

The hours are long,
the pay is small,
so take your time,
and buck them all.


Did your boss work for every penny of his paycheck, or is some of that coming from your labor? Remember that the next time you think about "working hard:" you aren't paid for all the work you do anyway; why give away more for free?

EC, deliberately bad photography 

25 years ago, John Chipotle had a simple dream: to get diarrhea whenever and wherever he wanted. Today we honor that dream.

:sponsored: Sponsored by Chipotle


Things bats have contributed to society:

* Lithium-Ion Batteries
* Batter
* Butter
* Bat grease
* Batman
* Classical era Greek poetry
* Dodge Charger
* Bat fever
* Bat fever vaccine
* Vaccine resistant bat fever
* Tony down at the liquor store
* The letter W

So the next time someone says “What have bats ever done for _me_?” you can respond with “These made up things. We should be kissing our bats, not deporting them to the Dark Realm.”

This Uber pool is taking the scenic route through the cemeteries of Colma and I shit you not I just saw a headstone that just said “Juicy” on it

Hit 1996 single 𝙄 𝙒𝙖𝙣𝙩 𝙔𝙤𝙪 by Savage Garden

My dog now pretends she needs to be let out at night when she knows the possum is out there. Now I have to go outside and squirt the possum with a hose and be all “nothing personal, my dog is the worst” before I can let her out.

Chungus muh creboomoo?

Show more
Toot! A Jason Scheirer Instance

The social network of the future: No ads, no corporate surveillance, ethical design, and decentralization! Own your data with Mastodon!